dating and relatinship advice

Five major communication problems
in relationships that you can fix!

Every single marriage or relationship has its good times and bad times. Financial difficulties, the stress of life's events, and health problems just have to be weathered as best you can. Although these problems are often the major reasons for divorce, communication problems in relationships are very often the root cause of all the problems. If you are not able to communicate effectively, it's almost guaranteed that you'll experience problems with your spouse. Good communication skills are the foundation for a strong and healthy relationship. Lets take a look at the five most common communication problems in relationships and what you can do about them to can get your relationship back on track.

1.Good two-way conversations. This communication problem is most common in long term relationships. You've probably heard it said that, over time, your partner is able to anticipate how your will respond in a conversation before you ever speak. You need to be willing to really listen to your partner without interrupting. If you are unable to do this then the not-listening syndrome takes effect, but this isn't always one sided. Sometimes both people begin to talk over each other, while in other cases, one person just keeps talking and will not invite any kind of response. Making an honest effort to restore good two-way conversations, with understanding to what each person's points are, will do wonders for eliminating communication problems in relationships.

2.Positive communication works well. We all have very busy lives, and this dosen't leave us much quality time left over to spend with our partner. If most of your communications is conversations about problems, this can wear thin. Reorganize or restructure your day so that you are able to spend at least an hour together each day. Use this time to talk about more positive topics or just relax together. It is quite clear that if most of the communications between the two of you are of a negative nature, you're creating a negative environment, which will harm your relationship.

3.Avoid the guilt trips. Another major offender that will hamper the communication problems in relationships is using guilt trips to get your way. This is much more common than you may think. For example, your spouse is all over you because you bought something that he or she thought was way too expensive. Maybe it was a bit pricy. If your response is a remark that digs into the past, detailing a particular mistake your spouse made, this is not productive and it is deflecting the conversation. In reality, you are putting a guilt trip on your partner in order to steer clear of your own mistake. Do yourself and your spouse a favor and avoid the guilt trips.

4.A bad attitude leads to a bad relationship. When a conversation begins to take a bad turn, take a step back. Be like a fly on the wall and examine each of your attitudes. Are you being confrontational? Irrational or angry? A bad attitude can turn ongoing, everyday communication problems in relationships into an ugly situation. Do your best to be objective. By continuing to be angry and having a bad attitude, you're just fueling the fire. Take a time out and calm down before continuing the conversation. confrontational or irrational attitudes will make a bad conversation much worse than it needs to be.

5.Don't play the blame game. This is similar to guilt trips, but playing the blame game is different because usually only one of you is playing this game. This is just plain arrogance and is often used by someone with a controlling personality. It serves two, very arrogant and counterproductive purposes. The person who is into the blame game feels self-righteous and in charge, while the individual who is blamed for everything feels resentful. This unhappy individual eventually suffers from a loss of confidence which leads to irrational attitudes and guilt trips. If this type of communication problem starts becoming a normal routine, then it's time for some professional counseling.

Each one of these communication problems in relationships are reparable. Address these communication issues if they apply to you. Remember, it has to be a mutual effort! Life is full of ups and downs, but both of you will be much happier with honest and open communication.